Fiat!

There  is a turning point for most of us

A moment when after great thought and effort

It becomes clear that no effort or thought will change  as a result of our efforts

Personally  I have tried for many years to develop a plan or a method so that others would see solutions to issues they might have

Without realizing it allowed  me to be a leader or rejected or included in life’s choices for myself, and occasionally, for others

But like stalagmite dripping, endlessly, freezing membranes into brittle arthritis

Time’s progression  has been a blessing for me as it reveals the secrets of aging

It has taken its toll on my quick solutions or suggestions

Slowly, so slowly, my quick wit and feet have left me

More  time has meant  meditating, and reflecting

Quite clearly now I can see others much like myself

Always  kind of understood old guys sitting around a McDonald’s breakfast table

Chatting about what they found interesting that day

Or commenting on what others might be thinking

This is my life now!

No longer can I jump in and be the solution

More often, individuals are opening the door for me

Offering to hold my arm to prevent a fall

I don’t actually wanna see a mirror or a video of myself walking

I’m OK with my walking. I’m OK that I am walking. I’m glad that I am walking

I have a lot more people prompting me, directing me in case I can’t remember

The 10th time they’ve told me how to do something or how to get somewhere

Pretty  much I’m starting to  believe that at some point I will just fade away

As I don’t really quite understand how much I have faded away

Nonetheless

Truly now I am just so happy to be with you,yes I am taking to you!

And  finally now I am able to say that this is my new reality

Thus the Latin phrase “Fiat” “Let It Be”

Frankxcameron.com 04/05/26

The night is warm

It seems the mornings beget  a chill

Socks, sweaters needed

The days swirls with chores

Easing the drafts

As afternoons wanes

Cool winds hasten dinner

Till at last

Again the night is

Warm with you

My peaceful eyes closing on your  face!

Copyright 2/13/2025 frankxcameron.com

Background and wallpaper

Just when I thought I knew everything

One of my three granddaughters

Surprised me again

She too has a monitored phone

Thought it might be a possible learning tool for her

And it has been

Games, drawings and age appropriate activities

Seems to rule her screen time

But one mourning on the way to school

Noticed what I thought was a different look to her screen

I queried her as to what it’s was

She responded ‘wallpaper’

Digging further I asked what was wallpaper  for

She responded ‘background’

Well the good news is that I’m still learning

Copyright 2/2/2025 frankxcameron.com

Puzzle skills

For ages, well it seems like ages

Periodically the name of someone who I am facing

Escapes me

Or was never retained

My brain has become

A very detailed typo

Were names fly across the typewriter in My mind

I look for clues in the face of the person in front of me

Noticing who they might be standing with

Listening to the conversation

Occasionally, I will hear someone reference their name

I jot it down in mporous mine

I even say it again and again, so I won’t forget it

And then take out my phone and put it in with the other names. I can’t remember

Any outside chance when I see them again, I’ll know their name

It’s a cruel trick that has been played on me. I blame it on artificial intelligence

Yes, yes, I actually am artificial intelligence

If I understand correctly

Artificial refers to something that is made

Remembering is something that if we don’t have, we have to create

Understandably, I often stand with a big smile on my face

As if the person I am looking at is one of my best friends

One time I bought a shirt that said

I am Frank! And you?

That got laughs, but it did get me a name

So frequently I can sit quietly picture the person, and just every now and then like a pinhole in my head

Their name comes to me, oh sweet blessing!

So this writing is really just

One of the reasons that the expression “you all”

Potentially saves me in a number of social situations

so yes, the New York Times, the Washington Post

Provide opportunities to solve puzzles

For myself, there is no greater opportunity

Then to look in your face and remember your name,

Frankxcameron.com

copyright November 1, 2024

It’s about that time

Really don’t know what got me to thinking

Lotta stuff laying around, been laying around for a lot of years

Some of it organized, some of it half organized

Some of it had an idea of being organized

Slowly and perceptively. I have come to understand that at some point

I’m leaving

Mostly I don’t wanna bother the people I’ve left

I’d rather they have pleasant memories of me

Rather than going through a ton of things

Feeling responsible to keep things

So here I am on a Saturday morning mid fall

Trying to develop a coherent presentation of who I was

So tried to minimize the files into importance and alphabetically

A bigger project was to digitize all the photos, so the 40 books we had of pictures

Could be streamed

Tough choices, and other areas had to be made

I had a number of birthday cards or Father’s Day cards

With  very touching and meaningful words

Even  now I don’t know what I’m gonna do with those

I have exceptional paintings done by my sister and wife

Actually I have about six other photographs for wall hangings

That really helped define my life in quotes and images

They’re  not likely to be kept by anyone else as they were my treasured items

Each  of us goes through this individually, I’m quite sure

Some of us want to leave a bit of a personal legacy

So now we ruminate on a cool Saturday morning

I understand I’m starting the final chapter

I do believe pictures will be a more desired option

Than a book that was never written

FXC  copyright 10/26/2024 frankxcameron.com

As Julie and I celebrate our 55th wedding anniversary and my 75th birthday

5 AM is a good time to reflect on what has been, what is and what might actually be

Marrying at 19 and 20 provided great opportunities to develop or sink

Being raised in incredibly supportive families provided a great framework

From there, Julie finished the job of raising me

We finished school , Julie went into teaching, I went to the Postal Service and then a little teaching

Four Children and five grandchildren have produced many photo ops and delightful moments

And just like so many others, we have had joys and sorrows

Yet our life raft has been faith, family, and friends

Yes, we are talking about you now

If I could write a book, it would be about our friends that have held us up

It would be about the many people who have encouraged us and help show us the way

In addition, for me, my life truly began with Julie

My sister’s best friend transformed into dreams I never knew

I do thank God so much for this time

Yes, there is a case to be made then I have been OCD about Julie

But no, nobody’s perfect

But from Julie and I, this is a shout out for all that you have given us

You will have our eternal gratitude, thank you

frankxcameron.com  Copyright 09/13/2024

Scottish plaid pajama bottoms

Just had to have them as they flashed across Kohl’s advertisement

Never really was a pajamas, man

Mostly slept with sweatpants.

But this was too much so reminiscing of the Cameron plaid

A lot  of red, some green, some blue

My purchasing agent from Kohl’s quickly obtained it for me

Wearing pajamas became so exciting

Alas my displ,erasures with taking  something downstairs to wash and dry and bring back up

For stalled the effort to maintain a sweet smelling bedroom

And so it happened one night, preparing precious sleep

Reaching under my pillow, aghast,  the pajama bottoms were gone

Didnt’t notice the sheets had been changed

I’m not too bright, but I did become suspicious that an individual

Had decided to wash my pajamas with the sheets

How dare an arbitrary insider

Make jaundiced decisions about what is clean

I already knew that if I sat and ate at a particular spot at the kitchen table

That as I arose from my seat, a cleaning rag with sanitizer   would be approaching

As if to get an ‘A’ rating for our house

The kitchen each night is impeccable absolutely impeccable

You couldn’t catch a germ in my kitchen if you paid for it

My conclusion about what happened to my pajamas, was true

They were in the wash with the sheets

In my mins an arbitrary  decision was made about the freshness of my Scottish plaid pajama bottoms

Of course, I discovered this this as I prepared for bed

And I’m not really quite that bright

it took me till the next morning with a cup of coffee in my hand

That  I was able to conclude that not only had the sheets been washed

But  my precious pajamas had been tossed in the washer with them

So now a conundrum,  I could speak up about the injustice of someone arbitrarily

Deciding when my pajamas were dirty

But then I remembered I got clean sheets and an exquisite companion out of the deal

I’ll save my thoughts for another time. OK.

Copyright 08/24/2024 frankxcameron.com.

A deep breath

The ‘Chock full of nuts coffee’ is made

My morning companion, Darcy’, is fed

Paid my early visit to the lavatory

Plugged in all my chargers

So all my Bluetooth and wi-if connections

Will update my health status

After a night’s sleep with my sleep apnea machine

Maybe put  a load of wash on

Check my email because that is really the only mail I get

Run through the regular news sources, NYT, WP, Facebook, Apple & Google news

Then finally a deep breath again

To quiet the nerve endings

That are rising to the top of my brain

So that maybe just maybe anxiety will not overwhelm me

My therapist assures me that I am my own worst enemy

That I thrust myself into everyone’s else problems with my own solutions

Which unfortunately fries all my mental circuits and some physical ones

Again more deep breathes

There is a school of thought that this deep breathing exercise

Should be repeated many times a day!

8/3/2024 Copyright frankxcameron.com              Frankxcameron@iglou.com

It’s only now

A great piece has come over me

I understand quite clearly now

That I will not be able to change everything in this world

However  there are a few items on what I guess is my bucket list

Onw is developing home repair skills,fixing things around the house skills

For a long time, I blamed the way I was raised.

My poor father, I laid it all at his feet

It’s clear now that I am quick capable of using a screwdriver

I don’t know what else I might be able to, but I do understand that I certainly can develop

It is on my terms however, I can only proceed slowly and when I understand what I have to accomplish

It is quite natural that I will periodically refer to my advisor. My home advisor help

However, I believe she has become somewhat burned out. I’m being my big-time assistant

It’s not like I need any new jobs, careers, interest, everything I have needed to do before is still here

Actually, my writing this is an indication of how I have been lagging in some of the things I enjoy doing

Writing is one of them

For a long time now, I have been silent muffled by my own lethargy

Quite clearly, my little scribbling of really been just me talking to myself

I suppose that was their main persona

So I will come back again, gladly

To speak to the one fellow who needs to continue this Journey!

frankxcameron.com Copyright 714 2024

It’s only now

Whispers reach my ears

Steps approaching of impending encounters

Till this time youth, ambition, myopic vision

Assured my goals and dreams would be completed

Yet as shadows begin to cloud my vision

Slowly an awareness there was much that was not seen

Doubts seeping into a once confident mind

Where have I been, what have I done

Well or poor

Not for me to know

frankxcameron.com  Copy write 06/17/2023